Legacy Status

My mom is someone who I have always looked up to and wanted to be just like. She has shown me the importance of family, Jesus, and love in this crazy life and she balances it all with such grace. My mom was a Phi Mu at The University of West GA from 1990-1992. I grew up hearing all the fun stories my mom made as a phi mu through her two years as a collegiate member. I would listen to her talk about her big sister in phi mu and she would always find her on facebook to show me what she looked like now. She always pulled out her old composites and pointed to all of her friends and each one had a story behind it. Every time she talked about phi mu she had such a big smile on her face and it seemed as if she could just talk forever.

I knew when I went to college I wanted to be just like my mom and make all those same memories that I could tell my kids one day... However, when it was my time to go through recruitment in 2018, my mindset changed.. I did not want to be known as a legacy. I wanted to be my own person and do my own thing and go into it with an open mind. As a legacy, going through recruitment can seem tough. You want to be liked and loved based on who YOU are not who your mom or grandmother was. This was my main struggle going through recruitment: The idea of wanting to find my own “home” while not “disappointing” my mom was kind of a hard pill to swallow.

Everyday that I walked into phi mu's room something stood out to me that I absolutely adored and the only thing I wanted to do the second I stepped out of the room was tell my mom. But I choose to ignore the signs God gave me in that room everyday and mask them with something I thought was cooler or more fun in another room, because I didn’t want it to just be because my mom was a phi mu. Everyday when I got back to my dorm room, I called my mom and told her every detail about every room and how I was feeling. I really wanted to be able to make my own decision without feeling like I was only tied down to one option. Never once did my mom pressure me or tell me what she wanted for me, she let me decide my own opinions about each sorority and listened to me go on and on about all of them. (She really is the best)!!

The last day after recruitment was finally over and bid day was the next thing to freak out about, I called my mom to update her and I will never forget what she asked me... “well did any of the girls ask you about your faith”- My mom knew this was the most important thing to me. This is why my mom means the world to me and I strive to be like her everyday. God used my mom to help remind me of where I belonged and also how special our phi mu bond was about to become to me.

As a legacy during recruitment, I never once felt like I was not being loved for who I was. I was never wanted for who my mom was 20 years ago, but instead for who I am now. I am so thankful to be a phi mu at JSU and share such a sweet and special bond with my very best friend, my mom! God placed me right where He needed me and I was able to find the best friends who push me to be my very best, just like my mom did!

The one thing I want other legacies to know is that you are loved for who you are! I want every girl going through to totally be themselves in every way, don’t be scared of what “could happen” because God has got your back! He is looking out for you in every step. Greek life really is the best and God will send you right where He needs you, I promise!

Love,

-Reagan Dooley, PC '18